Pater Noster

Our Father who art in Sassafras

Colnago be thy name
Thy col do come
Thy wheels be done
In Bayswater as it is in Col du Toumalet
Give us this Thursday morn' our daily grind
And forgive us our F words
As we F word them who F word against us
And lead us not into bad coffee
But deliver us from Shimano shit
For Thine is the king hill, the wattage and the glory.

Amen

Or if you prefer in the original Latinesque text: 

Pater Noster in Sassafras est

Nomine est Colnago
Colus teus est veni
Et Roundaboutus est per diddus
In Aqua Porta ad Col du Toumaletque
Nos Donnibus Thursday grindus diedem
Et Fucus qui fucus contra fucus et estque
Non caffe ducus est fucus plus
Sed nos de shitus faecus te deum
Quod montis grandus est phallus, et potestas grandus est biggus et gloria morning est meus

Eh hombres?

 

Thanks to Howard (TdL Poet Laureate)